Factory Night Excursions

Last night, I had my first experience at at "Goth Club" or any club for that matter. Everything I witnessed from butterfly wings to electrical taped nipples surely surpassed every expectation I had.

The night entailed myself along with several of my closest friends constantly being denied by girls on thedance floor. This most likely happened because we stuck out like a sore thumb in the midst of every industrial dancer there.

The highlights of my night were as followed:

-Stage moshing to Disturbed with two bros wearing plaid shorts.
-James Walton owning the stripper pole like it's his job.
-Rachel Knorp dancing with a man that had dreadlocks and lightbulbs attached to his fingers.

-Cody Duvall
Chicago, IL

Bassnectar BLOW out

Bassnectar was wild. Charlie was drunk as fuck, we was gettin' crazy. I saw charlie grindin' with some girl and then I got on the other side of her and we're just dancin' and I start to do this (sliding motion downward with his hand) and creeped my hand down her pants cause she was lovin' it. I'm starting to think this was nuts and got outa there. Charlie comes back a little after sayin' "Tell me why my pants were down and that girl was lickin' the tip of my dick in front of everybody on that dance floor."

-Robbie
Wayne, MI

Strippers were present.

Nothing compares to seeing a girl use James Draft's wang as a stripper pole in an ultraviolet setting.

-Anonymous

Very, wet, dreams.

I don't really go to many clubs, but I did watch this one girl pee herself passed out in club though. Not anything super great, I just saw people crowded around her and and they couldn't decide whether to wake her up or let her pee.

-James Parker

New York, NY

Pregnant Girls Can Rave Too.

a girl who pat said was pregnant grinded on me for like 15 minutes.

-Dillon Antulis

Lincoln Park, MI

Oops, wrong hole.

a girl got her butthole fingered on the dancefloor at our house. college...no parents.

-John Hein

Ann Arbor, MI

"suckin' on my titties like you wanted me.."

I believe this was the "school's out party at the beach frat" where my very story took place. A lot of outrageous things happened that night, I crowd surfed on a boogy board wearing a dress, and moshed to Andrew W.K. like nobody's business, but the real stories start when of course, Robbie Mansel was deejaying, perfect circumstances for something crazy to happen. I'm dancing real hard on the dance floor and i look over to see Whitney with her legs wrapped around Tomas Rodriguez's brother, Jose'. "Weird..random" is the first thought to pop through my head. Later, her tits are out and he is sucking them while hundreds of people around them are getting hyphy.

-myself